so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
