This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I have fence marks all over my body
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
