not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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