and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
