she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
