I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize