I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
My vagina just clenched in fear
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
