you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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