it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
