is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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