i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
