Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
