how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
The convent might be a nice break from real life
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