well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
Randomize
