We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
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I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
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I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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