I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
