I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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