the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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