im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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