I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize