It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
