I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize