Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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