Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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