I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Randomize
