how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize