am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
