He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
