I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize