i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
