Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
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