Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
Randomize
