idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
