This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
