Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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