So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
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My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
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I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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