Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
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