I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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