Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
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