no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
The struggles of a small town man whore
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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