My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
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Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
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I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.