Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college. http://tfl.nu/0xig
  Replies (24) Good night (815) Bad night (3230)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him? http://tfl.nu/uzgr
  Replies (65) Good night (732) Bad night (6654)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick http://tfl.nu/awtp
  Replies (16) Good night (2917) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night" http://tfl.nu/9y6d
  Replies (9) Good night (4074) Bad night (884)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  this is your brother

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;) (1-978): this is your brother http://tfl.nu/l4xz
  Replies (63) Good night (1212) Bad night (14305)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  your facebook page is a work of drunk art.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): your facebook page is a work of drunk art. http://tfl.nu/2ehc
  Replies (3) Good night (3653) Bad night (821)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (845): Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping http://tfl.nu/4jdo
  Replies (12) Good night (732) Bad night (2465)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia. http://tfl.nu/9rne
  Replies (8) Good night (1862) Bad night (1099)
• Favorite

  (863): View more from Florida

  I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (863): I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen. http://tfl.nu/kind
  Replies (8) Good night (1973) Bad night (955)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be. http://tfl.nu/nyya
  Replies (2) Good night (1330) Bad night (655)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit http://tfl.nu/p0py
  Replies (5) Good night (597) Bad night (931)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (519): Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is? http://tfl.nu/qsbg
  Replies (1) Good night (372) Bad night (589)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (520): You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha. http://tfl.nu/0ooa
  Replies (3) Good night (470) Bad night (250)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (386): Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost. http://tfl.nu/901r
  Replies (2) Good night (534) Bad night (224)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose. http://tfl.nu/648d
  Replies (1) Good night (204) Bad night (621)

Randomize