i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
