I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
