hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
