I hope mine doesn't look like that
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize