The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize