I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
