Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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