woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Sorry about my life...
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
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