ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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