If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Houston, we have a blender
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
